My future?

Okay, so there's this guy who gunned down his son-in-law a few years back. At the trial, the guy's lawyer said that the guy, at the time 62 years old, 5'8", and 285 pounds, couldn't have possibly been in good enough physical condition to commit the crime, leading to the now infamous "too-fat-too-kill" defense. (The too-fat guy's name, by the way? Edward Ates. Not making that up.) My favorite quote from the lawyer: "You look at Ed and you don't need to hear it from a doctor." Nice! Take that, expert witnesses!

Anyway. The trial ended in a conviction today and took place close to home in scenic Hackensack, New Jersey. To commemorate the occasion, I made ( this... )

No, I'm not doing much today. Why do you ask?