Sit in the back, and don't get called on

Let's say life is like a class. I'd be taking a test right now on the part of the class called "Getting a Job," and I'd be getting an F. I know I've talked about the job stuff before, but that was just the studying. Maybe a practice test here and there. But here it is, exam day, crunch time, and I'm sitting at my desk, chewing on my pencil eraser, and staring off into space. Occasionally maybe I doodle a little something in the margin of the test paper. So I dunno...it's hard to pin down exactly how much time I have to hand this bad boy in, but suffice it to say...the clock is ticking. I hate tests.

Oh, and speaking of tests...I'm taking them again. Yes, that's right...casino school has decided that somehow I'll be a better roulette dealer if I take written tests on the subject. We have one every week. Now...I'm the first to admit that what I'm learning here is not exactly rocket science. That said, I'm embarassed to have to admit that my test scores haven't exactly been at the top of the curve. I mean...I'm just making a lot of dumb mistakes and stuff, but still...how sad it makes me to turn in a less-than-perfect score on a roulette test. Jesus.

Anyway...that sort of jackassery aside, things are going okay. Class continues...nothing really exciting there. I continue to spin the little ball around. We had a fire drill at the school the other day; that was a little excitement in an otherwise routine day. The alarm went off, and our teacher started herding us out into the hallway. "No, no," somebody said, "Not this way. Go out the emergency exit." So we all turned around and headed out the emergency exit into the parking lot in back of the building. My classmates and I were making jokes about how our teacher was directing us right into the "fire." Once we had all piled outside, one of them said, "Hey, you remember that episode of Seinfeld?"

He was talking about the episode where George is at some kid's birthday party and he spots a fire in the kitchen. He raises the alarm and everyone makes a dash for the exit. George, in his panic, pushes over an old lady in a walker and runs over several children (and a clown) to force the door open and make good his escape. We laughed about it, but then it sank in: I was basically the first guy out of the room. I hadn't even thought about it; I just grabbed my shit and went where I was told. I really had to wonder...in an actual emergency, would I have done the chivalrous thing? Or would I have just hauled ass out of there and never looked back? Funny that a fire drill made me examine my continuing transformation into George Costanza, but...there it is. Good times!

Big night on "Jeopardy" tonight. It's Celebrity Jeopardy time, so it's all celebs and it's coming from Radio City Music Hall for the occasion. That's not why it was a big night, though. It was a big night because it was a L&O throwdown! Three stars from three different "Law & Order" shows: Sam Waterston from the original, Kathryn Erbe from CI, and Chris Meloni from SVU. Man, I gotta tell you...I think they were all drunk. And I think Stabler chased his with a quick hit of speed or something, because that guy couldn't stand still. Anyway...all in good fun. Nice to see some of my most familiar TV faces without their characters. I don't want to spoil the ending or anything, but let's just say the winner had Trebek by the throat at the end of the episode and was slapping him around shouting, "YOU'RE DISGUSTING!" Good times!

So, yeah, this is my life. Fire drills and Celebrity Jeopardy. Been doing more fence painting, by the way. I've finished with the primer, and today I spent the afternoon slathering on the actual paint. It's quite a different proposition, I was to learn. The primer seemed easier, I guess, because it was so different from the wood, it was easy to tell where I had and hadn't done my job. But the paint...it's like this slightly off-white color being painted over white primer. What the hell, man! I think I might have been catching the sun just wrong or something, but it was really hard for me to tell where I had already painted and where I had yet to paint. I basically just tried to attack it systematically and hoped for the best. It's funny when you think something's going to be well within your abilities, but it turns out to be a bit more of a challenge than you were prepared for. Like fence painting. Or taking roulette tests. I don't know about you, but it makes me feel like an asshole. Good times!

We're already well into NaNoWriMo week 2, and I have yet to do jack poop. Not that I don't have some vague ideas of what to do, but somehow I'm just not managing to find the time. Which is dumb, really, considering how I'm not really doing anything except class. I think it's actually more of an issue of space, though. I just don't have much solitude these days. I think it's starting to wear me down. Not because of the writing...though certainly the writing thing isn't being helped. Just lately I've really started to get that feeling again...like I might start to wig out if I don't claim a little space to myself soon. Which is...you know...mighty high-falutin' talk for someone with no job, but hey, a man can bitch. But anyway...yeah. No wordcount for me.

Oh, so...I'm actually getting back to New York this weekend. Saturday, to be exact. It's just a quick day-trip, and it's all family-related, so I'm afraid I won't have a chance to see anyone or do anything. Basically I'm going to see The Lion King with my mom and my sister. I'm sure there will be other familial hoo-hah involved, but that's the crux of it. It's really made me realize that it's been quite a while since I've made it back to the City, though, really. I don't know when I can head back up for my own pleasure. Maybe once I get a job. :) We shall see.

Anyway...I think that's about it. Just wanted to get my weekend check-in taken care of since I'll be on the road Saturday, and Sunday belongs to football. ;) I hope you're all doing well out there. Smell ya later!